Parents play a very important role in a person’s life. Despite the socio-economic difficulties, they raised their children as well as possible. They fulfill all our needs as best they can. With the birth of a child, parents say goodbye to many of their past preferences. For the sake of their children’s happiness, in their eagerness to secure their lives, parents give up many wishes and at the same time internalize many dislikes without expressing them outwardly. Becoming a parent is a new beginning in life. A big change is happening from what they lived until yesterday. Isn’t it our duty to give them respect, love, and care? Why do some of us leave them in nursing homes? What makes the care of aging parents a liability for us? Don’t forget that they are our parents. The importance of children protecting their parents, especially the elderly, goes without saying. Because we all know that it is one of our most important duties.
Care of aging parents- it is our responsibility
When discussing parents, let’s first define a family before we discuss care for aging parents. The family is made up of parents and having parents in the family makes it a family. Normally we define a family as a union of a man and a woman, i.e. a legal relationship. There may be children and sometimes there may not be, but the word ‘family’ is complete when children are included. The joint family system was one of the noblest cultures of family i.e. Joint family system is an important system. When different generations of the same family live together in the same house, it is called a joint family. But now the rise of science and technology and many other reasons have led to the destruction of this system and therefore a division has started in this system and joint families have become single unit families. That too has become a hindrance to the care of aging parents.
What are the barriers to care aging parents?
- Now women are also going out in search of employment.
- The reasons are many, firstly, a family cannot survive on the income of only one member, and then the conviction that women should not be stuck in the kitchen.
- Apart from that, equal rights and equal status for women in all fields have been granted by our democratic laws.
- Parents are left alone in homes where husband and wife go to work.
- In some households, parents have to live alone because sons and daughters are all away due to various reasons and they feel very helpless in their old age.
- But in some other families, parents live with their married sons or daughters.
- The problems here are many.
- First of all, when parents, children, son-in-law or daughter-in-law, and grandchildren live together, there are often character conflicts and differences of opinion.
- Children may feel that their parents are an obstacle and hindrance to their happy life when differences of opinion and quarrels are common.
- Hence the tendency to neglect or isolate the parents is developed.
- In such circumstances, the old parents feel the intensity of their loneliness and unhappiness.
- They feel that they are unwanted and thus suffer great humiliation.
- Don’t forget that as much as we need our parents when we are young, they need us in their old age.
- When there is a wound in the body, everyone can see the blood flowing from it, but no one can see the tears of pain that flow from the wound in the mind.
Many elderly parents are living alone
- There are many elderly parents living alone.
- The challenges they face are many.
- Some may have lost their children, so they may be at the mercy of other people and dependent on them.
- They are subjected to many tortures.
- They are physically attacked.
- They are exploited financially.
- Apart from that, they are subjected to harmful actions like theft, housebreaking, etc.
- Being denied the necessary food, medicine, rest, and mental entertainment is torture.
- Physical, mental, and emotional difficulties are common in humans as they age.
- There are many people who exploit this situation.
- Their own children, relatives, friends, neighbors, and countrymen are all in this group.
- It is a common sight to promise to protect these elderly parents, take their property and wealth and then leave them in orphanages, pilgrimage centers, or old age homes.
- Although there are special laws for the protection of senior citizens, the truth is that most of the time none of these are effective.
- Apart from these aged parents who are thus neglected by their children, there are others who suffer the pain of poverty in their old age as they have no one to look after them.
- There are those who cannot bear poverty and go to work.
- Extreme poverty and loneliness force some to work.
- Seventy and eighty-year-olds are working as security personnel.
- They are forced to work for meager wages in the midday sun with signs inviting passengers in front of roadside hotels.
- Their condition is very pitiful, without money, without people, without friends, a very bad situation.
- Let’s hold them together and console them.
We should be role models for our children
Remember, parents and family members are children’s first teachers. The family is the first school where children learn life-long values like love, care, and compassion. If the first school is the home, then the parents who teach there are the first teachers. They are watching their parents closely. What children learn by watching them is repeated in their life. It becomes part of their nature. Parents should be very careful what they say about their parents and how they treat them in front of their children. Because the world around children is family, friends, parents, television, and mobile phones. Observing their parents inspires children to learn good speech, hospitality, sharing, respect for grandparents, love for them, and a habit of prayer.
Children learn something from everyone they meet, especially their parents, and then copy, act, and imitate it in life. Imitation becomes a part of their life. Children who pay attention to the world around them see what their parents do, how they talk to their elderly parents, how they love them, and how they get angry and imitate them at an age when they cannot distinguish between good and evil.
If children grow up seeing their parents show expressions of gratitude, love, brotherhood, and forgiveness, their lives will be filled with goodness and they will apply it in their own lives. But those who blame and isolate each other and leave their own elderly parents in nursing homes set the same example for their children. Children who learn from this type of family environment tend to blame each other in the future and get away with blaming others for their mistakes. Remember that the example of parents never ends, even if the children grow up. It should be understood that parents, directly and indirectly, influence the behavior of their children. Children who grow up in an atmosphere of love and peace, who grow up seeing parents who care for their elderly parents with love and care, will try to implement it in their own lives. As children watch their families come together to eat together and share joy and love, they learn the value of family.
The influence of grandparents on children
- It is the duty of children to look after their aged parents responsibly and ensure their protection.
- Grandparents are the ones who caress every baby born on this earth.
- No one will give our children as much love and affection as they do.
- In fact, grandparents are the ones who love our children by fulfilling their little wishes, giving in to their stubbornness, and making them the meals they love.
- Grandparents like this are the blessing of every family and they have a great influence on the children.
- Many parents go to work in peace just because they have grandparents like this.
- Who else can we trust?
- Who else but we will protect these grandparents?
- Care of aging parents is our responsibility.
- Our children should see it and grow up.
- This is what they should see and understand.
- Children who receive the love, care, and protection of their parents along with the care and protection of their grandparents grow up with greater mental health and well-being.
- Therefore, when these children grow up, they take care to transfer the care and love they have received to others.
- Because they’ve got plenty of it.
- Another problem that many parents face is that they are often unable to take care of their children due to their busy schedules.
- This is where the presence of grandparents becomes a blessing.
- Grandparents are the guardian angels of our children.
- Many grandparents make sacrifices to impart the love and protection to the younger generation that their parents are unable to provide.
- They impart what they have learned from their own experience to their children.
- Grandparents play a huge role in our children’s lives.
- The way they treat babies is worth seeing.
- The new generation has a lot to learn from them.
- Grandparents are angels who strengthen them by correcting them when they make mistakes.
- They also teach them things through stories and
- Grandparents give them small tasks and make them do them.
- The presence of grandparents helps them to learn and practice these things.
- This is how children learn the values of life at an early age.
- When they are in a situation unable to do anything because of age or diseases, it is the responsibility of their children and grandchildren to protect those who have sacrificed for them.
What can we do for our elderly parents?
- If parents live with siblings, visit them often.
- Call parents regularly.
- The memory that children are remembering is an inspiration to them.
- They pour out their grief through their words.
- Then they should be held together and comforted by our words.
- Sometimes even if our parents are in our own homes, we are not able to visit their rooms due to busy schedules.
- Go into their room from time to time.
- Even if you can’t be near them all the time, sometimes you should listen to their words and sorrows.
- If they are taking medicines for any disease, make sure that they have taken them on time.
- Find out what changes to make in their diet.
- Rub the hands and feet of the parents.
- It should be understood that frequent visit and conversation gives them excellent psychological support.
- Make time to be with them and advocate for them.
- Helping and comforting them are precious gifts for them.
- Busy people can hire caregivers to help their parents.
Every parent should serve their parents and grandparents and live as an example in front of their children. Children should understand that and if they understand then they will respect and love their own parents. Love, mercy, care, and kindness will not be received from all. Because these things can only be obtained from those who are rich in heart.
Challenges of caring for aging parents
- Caregivers and children of elderly parents often do not know how to treat them.
- Elderly parents talk and behave in different ways.
- There is a saying that six and sixty are the same.
- Elderly parents sometimes complain about us to those who visit them.
- Those who protect and visit them should be aware of this.
- Don’t forget, as they age, our parents are exposed to more physical and mental stress.
- In fact, this is a form of torture.
- There should be an awareness of aged parents’ psycho-physical needs.
Final thoughts
They are our parents, don’t forget them. Care of aging parents is our responsibility. As we grow up, we should love and respect those who raised us. Most parents have given up their own wishes, desires, and dreams and live for their families and children. This is not just one person’s problem many parents live like this around us. None of the children consider this a sacrifice. If you tell your children about your past sufferings, you will have to listen to your children’s teasing saying that they are telling old stories. When you fight and ignore your parents, if you look into their faces and eyes, you will understand that they are holding their heads high with a sea of sadness hidden in their hearts. To know their glory, suffering, pain, and sorrow, every son must become a father, and every daughter must become a mother. The care of aging parents is a blessing.
Old parents’ lives are so miserable that they crave companionship and assistance. Why do some people forget their parents? Many of us develop lifestyles and habits that please our senses, and, most of the time, we are self-satisfied without being concerned about our parents. The thought that we would be miserable if we cared for our parents is ingrained in some of us. Some believed that if they began taking care of their parents, they would ruin their happy lives. In reality, if their problems go unresolved, they can negatively affect our own lives, ruining us. If unattended and unresolved, parents’ problems will haunt us tomorrow for sure because we live in an interdependent society.
Don’t forget that they are parents. Make sure the steps you walk up are free of tears from your father. When conquering the heights, you must be sure that there is no mother’s curse behind you. When we neglect to care for aging parents while they are alive, it is pointless to find and feed orphanages after their deaths.
Image Credit: Canva.com
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